ICSF Quotes List 2010

The ICSF Quotes List contains perfectly innocent things said by people in the library. From c. April '09 - January '11.
And, always remember: Context: Be Damned!

Helen: Ethel just came in looking for you. You're alternating.
Simon: They're the same person.
Joseph: Yes. We never exist in the same place at the same time.

Fluffy: No spanking! Beat me to death, but no spanking!

Wouter: It was such a good day until you people started talking...

Cameron: Its not so much of a prank. More murder.

Cameron: I mean, there's that US senator who said that "there should be no such thing as a Christian child".
Joseph: Cameron, that was Richard Dawkins.

Joseph on Zab: Don't batter him like a kitten: he might get aroused!

Rebecca-Liz: Well, apparently it does force erections

Cameron: I got a bit banged up...and a branch fell on me.

Ethel: I have a distinct taste...for shit.

Fluffy (aiming for "The point is moot"): The poot is moint!

Wouter, excitedly: Oooh! We could melt cheese in this.

Zac (on Gor): I approve of these books.

Peter to Joakim: I want it on the record: I was not flirting with you.

Cameron: A strange attraction around penises has formed.

Jacob: It's a strange conversation when vaginal mucus is involved.
Rebecca-Liz: You mean cervical mucus.
Jacob: That's the bugger!
Rebecca-Liz: No, it's not...

Joakim: Sorry, I'm being an idiot: badgers and sheep are different animals.

Cameron: There are many horses that appeal to me...*
...ten minutes later...
Cameron: I'm not thinking about auto-erotic strangulation. I'm still thinking about horses.

*Editor's note: This was the literal translation of Cameron's attempt at making the insult "your mother is less attractive than a horse" in French.

Cameron: I do not watch giant cat porn.

Fluffy: Peter, how many session will it be before you screw me hard?

Aisha: I've seen plenty of naked people...

Chandana: Oh god! That's a dildo!

Zac: Please, kiss me, Peter! Kiss me! I long for the taste of your flesh!

Wouter: Cameron is not delicious & spreadable!

Fred: I behave my nipples. [sic]

Gabriel: Clearly I'm the kind of person that was ruthless as a foetus.

Rebecca-Liz: I don't remember when I broke my hymen. It was probably when I was little.

Cameron: I'm currently storing porn on Peter's hard drive, thank you.

Gabriel: This is why I don't go to sleep: when I do, bad things happen.

Fluffy: I don't want to know what's in Peter's sexual larder!

Peter: I have Fluff in my mouth!

Tom: I just saw it: instinct took over. I jumped on it, and I've been stuck here for two hours

Von Clemence: And I'm a bigger mouth.

Sonja: It's hard even for me.

Cameron: I don't have a sexual larder; if anything it is his [Peter's] cupboard.
Wouter: I Am the contents of the cupboard!

Sonja: What were you expecting me to do? Kill him with my thighs?

Rebecca-Liz: Did you not see what he can do with his hand?

Fluffy: Jacob, your "little chigger" is your penis!
Jacob: Can you look up "my little chigger"?

Lucy, sighing: Cows don't lay eggs...

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