ICSF Quotes List 2006

The ICSF Quotes List contains perfectly innocent things said by people in the library. From November 05 - February 2006.

Jon: If I could take any part of Tutankhamen, it would be his penis.

Tim: Can we please stop talking about testicle removal.

Ed: Silence for Bill Bailey! (to record his first good suggestion, evar)

Mark (to Ian): do you not have any love of your groin?

Ali: You were two inches from his mouth...
Steve: ... and you still managed to get it all over my face.

Ian: Baz, Give me Mr. Screwdriver.

Baz: It's like trying to play with a nipple ... well, it is!

Steve (for the record): Ben is at a My Little Pony convention in Manchester.

Rebecca: They're hippies ... Vulcan hippies!
Ali: That's an excellent concept.

Rebecca: I used to put down my occupation as a mad scientist, but now I want to be a tribble farmer.

Rebecca: I'd rather be caught with porn than Star Trek novels.

Laura: If his head explodes, I bag the goatee.

Ben: Kath would rather marry Vicky than me.

Vicky: ... so, Ben is worth fortieth of a camel ...
Ben: hmmm ... [strokes chin] ... which fortieth?

Tim (Tom?): In kid's cartoons, all the girls are wet.

Ben: I shall take advantage of the mortal...

Tim: Which wire do I have to pull on to get it up?

Mark: Fondle my knee, fondle my fucking knee.

Malc: Baz violates himself all the time.

Dan: I got a tank into a place you'd never think a tank could get.

Mark: I like sucking!

Steve: Inject, then wiggle.

Kath: It wasn't me, it was my evil penis!

Ed: I would personally fellate a smurf.

Alex: The less said about Steve's ass on the quotes list the better.

Ben: fine, I will watch the interview in the privacy of my own bedroom.

Owain: Stop with the mounting of Vicky.

Matt: I've had people far heavier than Ben...

Ben: I'll show you widdle!

Alex: It looks like a mound of brown is not something I want to hear said about my food.

Peter: Malc is doing the work of two men.

Cristina: I want to build a cybernetic Alex.

Dan: You can do it quite well with your forearm!

Ben (about Owain): He fires wildly in all directions.

Alex: Kath, you have Gwen above you and Vicky below.

Steve: Bigger! Longer! Stabbier!

Dan: I'm going to the Land of Rubber. (WHY?????)

Dan: It's the size of it that's important, otherwise it's hard to jam the fingers in.

Ben: But I don't want to eat penis.

Alex: You're not a cat, you just purr if I stroke you right.

Dan (to Ian): I can put it somewhere else later if you want.

Steve: Rifted!

Vicky: I am not shaven!

Owain: Keep it there and use it to beat off anyone who comes too close.

Ali: We want to mate our large pink snake.

Sergei: I'm just so charismatic, everyone wants to kick me in the head.

Alan: I'll bring my cane and beat people off with it.

Alan: A tied up Harry Potter - how cool is that?

Jem: Hercules. Why is it all sticky?

Back to Quotes Index (What, you want more?)