Dart January 2003

From ICCC

This must have been the most planned ICCC trip on record. Not only had Theo booked the Dart tickets and bunkhouse before the summer, he'd even got people to give him deposits. So with all this pre-planning it was an expectant bunch of paddlers who met at the stores on Friday evening. To no-one's surprise, Tim and Paula were late; apparently this was because she had to wash her hair. Still, with Jon and Becky dispatched earlier on the shopping run, we managed to leave the union by 7.30. Rob's insistence on cracking open the family size bottle of White Lightning that he'd found in the stores led to another game of "Truth or Drink", with a swig of the tramp fuel as the punishment for not answering your question. Some fairly interesting facts were revealed about certain people's sex lives, Paula confused everyone with her description of how bra sizes work, and Rob pursued his relentless interest in the size of Theo's manhood, as compared to the sex stick. So there was general relief when we stopped at the services. No one could resist the tempting special offer on Cadbury's Crème Eggs, and once back in the bus the boys held a competition to see how many they could fit in their mouths at once. Rob failed miserably, only managing 3, though no-one else could cope with more than 4. Tim felt the need to wash his down with more cider.

We arrived at our 5 star camping barn in Holne to find Jon, Becky and Lou already there and the beast of a wood stove burning nicely. After a few beers we headed to bed, as an early awakening was planned for the next morning. Not everybody had brought karrimats, but Lou had brought along a car-full of cardboard boxes for the disorganised people to sleep on. Rob carefully constructed a little house to sleep in, but this was soon destroyed by an amusingly pissed Poke.

A ludicrously early start (breakfast on the table by 7.30!) saw us a snowy carpark at Dartmeet to join up with Tim F and Claire at 8.15. The river was very low, but despite pleading requests to wait until later when it was warmer and the ice had thawed ("I'm sure there will be loads more water in the river by 10") the decision was made to put on as soon as possible. Rob, Tim and Jon sped off to do the shuttle whilst the rest of us chilled out (literally) in the snow. Kathy and Asa promptly disappeared into the nearby ladies toilets, arousing our suspicions, but apparently their attempts to keep warm were restricted to defrosting their extremities under the hand driers.

The Upper Dart is an absolutely great section river, and despite the low water level was thoroughly enjoyed by everybody. I was suffering from slightly disturbed karma and took a dip or two, but everyone else decided it was far too cold for swimming. Rob, Theo, both Tims and Mark ran "Euthanasia Falls", with Mark taking a particularly sweet line despite not really being able to see where he was going. Most people ran "Surprise, Surprise", with some fairly amusing lines being taken, though luckily no major pins. Tim F's car had been sensibly left in the carpark at Newbridge, and lots of wusses decided to abandon the river in favour of the showers. Those of us who could still feel our hands carried on down the easier "Loop" section, lured by the promise of some 4* coaching from Rob. The mysteries of reverse ferry gliding were explained, and small waves were played in. However, we were all relieved to get off the water, as it had been a long day's paddle in arctic conditions.

Back at the barn, a mountain of chilli was swiftly cooked up by masterchefs Theo and Paula, whilst the people due to do their 4* the following day had a panic-inducing read through the syllabus. Since the village pub was so conveniently located it would have been rude not to visit, so we poddled down there after dinner. Lou seemed decidedly lacking in drinking stamina, and left after 1 drink only to find that we'd cleverly locked ourselves out of our accommodation; thankfully the spare key was obtained after a bit of negociation with the neighbours.

Everyone was pretty tired, and it wasn't really a drinking games type of pub, so we settled for chatting, and a mellow pint or 5. Darren, Paula's mate and our 4* assessor, joined us and filled everyone in on the assessment plus a few amusing stories about "Little Miss" Volkmer. No real shenanigans on our return, though a small group of us had fun decorating Rob who had conveniently fallen asleep.

On Sunday morning the 4* groups met up with Darren in the Dart Country Park at 10, leaving the others in bed - their plan was to run the Erme later in the day. We had a brief lesson on boat repair (quite useful for those paddling some of the older club boats!), followed by a paddle down the Loop to demonstrate our skills. Becky and Kathy racked up a swim each, while I actually managed a roll for once. Despite it being an assessment it was a fairly chilled run, and we all learned stuff as well. Mark and I both had to roll after our comically pathetic attempts at rock-splatting. Before long we were back at the Country Park to learn we'd all passed and grab a hot shower and celebratory pint. The other group soon joined us in the bar, apparently the Erme Gorge had been enjoyed by all, though the journey back had been enlivened by a slight disagreement between Lou and Paula. Jon headed straight back to London, while the minibus stopped off in Exeter on the way home for food in a pub; this took quite a long time as Asa ended up with a free second pint and I wanted pudding, so we didn't actually get back to the union until 11.30.

Thanks to Theo for organising a quality weekend - we should definitely return to the Dart next year.

This trip gave rise to a couple of pearls of wisdom which we should all learn from:-